


Dave Strider's Hot Brother

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: M/M, Oh jesus, i'm not even, okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-12
Updated: 2013-02-12
Packaged: 2017-11-29 01:16:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,480
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/681041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John realises Dave's bro is actually kind of really hot. Shenanigans ensue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Dave Strider's Hot Brother

“Hey, John,” Dave says, opening the door to his apartment, “Sup?”

“Hey,” you say, walking in past him, “What’s up?”

“I’ve just got to go out for a bit,” he says, grabbing a jacket from behind the door, “Just go and sit in the living room or something.”

“Cool.”

You go into the living room and collapse onto the futon. You sigh heavily as you hear the door slam closed, and wonder how long Dave is going to be. Kicking a puppet off of the end of the futon, you search around for the remote, and find it under another puppet. You think there are definitely too many puppets in this place. You’re about to turn the TV on when you hear a crashing noise behind you. Turning around, you see a grown man lying in a pile of puppets on the floor. It looks like he just fell out of the ceiling.

“Hey,” you say, resting your elbows on the back of the futon.

“Sup,” he says, nodding curtly in your general direction and propping himself up on one elbow.

“You okay?”

“Yeah.”

You smirk a little as he gets up, almost tripping over on a puppet.

“I think you have too many puppets,” you say, flicking one off of the back of the futon.

“Nice soft landing, though,” he says, shrugging.

“You’re Dave’s bro, aren’t you?” you ask, thinking that the only other possibility is that he’s an extremely confident burglar.

“Yeah. And you’re his friend, John, right?”

“That’s me!”

You grin broadly, sitting up slightly.

“He went out, though,” you say, the grin vanishing, “I’m not sure when he’ll be back.”

Dave’s bro nods understandingly.

“Rude,” he says, and you laugh.

“It is a bit boring without him,” you admit, flopping down so your head is resting on your forearms, which are folded on the back of the futon.

He nods, pauses for a moment, then walks over to the futon, carefully avoiding all the puppets scattered across the floor. You twist your head round, your eyes following him across the room, then turn all the way around so you’re sitting properly on the futon as he sits down next to you.

“You got the remote?” he asks.

“Here,” you say, handing it to him, “Think there’s anything good on?”

“Let’s see.”

He flicks the TV on, and you blush when the first thing to appear is a porn channel. Glancing sideways, you see that Dave’s bro has also turned slightly red, as he quickly changes channel. Neither of you mention it.

“Glee?” you snort, as he pauses on it, and he quickly moves on.

He keeps flicking through the channels until it gets back to the porn, then turns the TV off.

“Nothing good, then,” he says, shrugging.

You sigh and slide slowly over sideways, until you’re lying down with your knees awkwardly folded in front of you. Looking up, you see Dave’s bro looking at you. At least, you think he’s looking at you. It’s hard to tell with those dumb animé shades covering his eyes. And, dumb shades or not, you start to notice that Dave’s bro is kind of hot. By kind of, you mean really. Really, really hot. You look away, feeling your face turn red, and think these really aren’t the sort of thoughts you should be entertaining about your best friend’s older brother.

“Did Dave say how long he’d be?” he asks, and you shake your head.

He sighs, folding his arms and then unfolding them again. You roll onto your back and hug your knees against your chest, burying your face in them and trying to think of something other than Dave’s bro.

“Are you okay?” he asks, and you sit up awkwardly, turning even redder.

“I’m fine.”

You drum your fingers against your thigh, trying to think of something to say. Preferably something that would make you sound like a vaguely sane human being, although you think your chances of giving that impression are more or less completely destroyed.

“Are you sure? You look a little... flushed.”

You didn’t think it was possible for you to turn even more red, but apparently it is. You feel like a human tomato. You try to say you’re fine, but you can’t say anything at all.

“You don’t look okay,” he says, leaning over and gently placing the back of his hand on your forehead, “Are you ill?”

You shake your head, feeling more embarrassed than ever, and beginning to realise that your bright red face isn’t your most pressing problem at the moment. You think about going to wait for Dave outside. It might be less embarrassing.

“Oh,” Dave’s bro says, looking like he finally realises what’s really wrong, and you realise you don’t even know his name.

You find your thoughts split between wondering when your life came to this and searching desperately for an escape. They scatter into a million pieces when he leans over and kisses you. Too many thoughts flash across your mind for you to make any more sense of them than “this is good” and “I would like this to keep happening”. You’re disappointed, then, when he pulls away.

“Sorry,” he mutters, “Um. That wasn’t... That was a bad idea.”

“No, it wasn’t.”

You smile a little and pull him back into an awkward kiss, even though you really don’t know what you’re doing. He resists at first, then gives in and kisses you back. It gets a lot better when he does. You might not know anything about kissing, but he certainly seems to. He shifts over so his legs are on either side of you, making the angle less awkward, and you sigh a little, tilting your head upwards and letting him deepen the kiss.

“Are you legal?” he whispers, pulling away, and you giggle.

“Isn’t it a bit soon to be asking that?” you ask, grinning.

You try to kiss him again, but he turns away, sighing, and your mouth hits his jaw. Unperturbed, you continue kissing that instead.

“This is really wrong,” he says, sitting up, “You’re just a kid. You’re my kid brother’s best friend.”

“And you’re my best friend’s hot brother,” you say, giggling.

You can see his eyes roll behind his shades, and realise you’re acting like a kid, but you don’t really care.

“If it helps,” you say, “I don’t think you can get me pregnant.”

“God, you are such a dork.”

“I know.”

He sighs, and you smile, and he leans in to kiss you again. You decide you really like kissing. You think you could probably do this all day. You don’t even care how long Dave takes any more. Actually – there’s a point. What if Dave comes home?

“Mmph,” you say, pulling away, and he moves on to your neck, “What about Dave?”

“What about him?”

“What if he comes home and sees us making out on the futon?”

“Screw Dave.”

You giggle.

“No thanks,” you say, moving his mouth back to yours, “I’d rather screw you.”

“Oh, god. That was such an awful line.”

“Shut up and kiss me.”  
He gladly obliges. You’re really getting into it when you hear the door open and Dave walk in. A loud crash startles you, and you break off the kiss, turning to look at Dave. He’s standing over a mess of unidentifiable shards. You wonder what he dropped.

“Oh, hey, Dave,” you say, as if he didn’t just walk in on your making out with his brother.

“I’m not even sure I want to know what the fuck’s going on here,” he says.

“Dave, I can explain,” Dave’s bro says, pulling away from you and starting to stand up.

“No, just go back to whatever you were doing,” Dave says, starting to walk towards his bedroom, “I’m just going to hit my head against the wall til I forget everything I just saw.”

“Oh, come on, Dave,” you say, pouting, “It’s not that bad.”  
“John, I’m not even going to go into how bad this is.”

He slams the door to his room, hard, and the apartment goes silent.

“Should we talk to him?” you ask, looking at Dave’s bro.

“Maybe we should give him some time to cool off,” he suggests.

“I guess,” you say, shrugging.

You continue worrying about Dave for approximately point two seconds longer, then turn to his bro with what you hope is a seductive smile.

“In the mean time...” you say, pulling him back towards you.

“You’re awful,” he says, leaning in and kissing you.

“I know.”  
You manage to end up lying on your back on the futon, with him on top of you. The making out part is going well, but you’re not sure what to do with your hands. You end up just resting them on his back. That gives you an idea, and you grin fiendishly as you slide one hand down and into his pants. He moans a little as you squeeze his ass.

“I can hear you making out!” Dave yells from his bedroom, “I cannot BELIEVE you are doing this to me!”

You giggle, breaking your kiss, and slip your other hand up under his shirt.

“You little devil,” Dave’s bro says, slipping off his sunglasses and dropping them onto the floor.

“I know.”

You grin, pulling his shirt up over his head and discarding it on top of the sunglasses, then pulling him down for more kissing.

“Mm, stop trying to take my clothes off,” he says, as you fiddle the zipper on his pants.

“Make me.”

He does, pulling your hands away and pinning your arms on either side of your body. You pout. He rolls his eyes and kisses you, and you smile. His grip on your hands loosens as he leans into the kiss and you slip them back over to his pants.

“Stop it,” he mutters, kissing your jaw.

“I can’t believe you’re still making out,” Dave shouts, and you can hear him hitting something.

“You’re just jealous!” you shout back, and Dave’s bro laughs.

“Shh,” he says, putting a finger on your lips.

From Dave’s room, you hear some loud banging noises. You giggle.

“Let’s make him really mad,” you whisper, and he rolls his eyes.

“I think you’re the worst best friend ever,” he says, gently pushing your shirt up and pulling it off over your head.

“He’d do the same for me.”

You moan involuntarily as he starts kissing his way down your torso, then do it again when you hear Dave swearing loudly.

“Stop that,” his bro says, swatting your stomach.

“Nope.”

He blows a raspberry on your stomach and you giggle. Dave groans loudly. You giggle some more.

“This is fun,” you say.

He looks up at you, raising his eyebrows, and you giggle again. From the next room, you can hear Dave shouting something about how much of an asshole you are.

“Oh, you think this is funny?” Dave’s bro asks, giving you a suggestive look.

“It’s very funny,” you say, giggling.

He smirks and slips his hands down to the waistband of your jeans.

“You sure about that?” he asks, slowly undoing the button.

“Mm,” you say, nodding and biting your lip.

He pauses, giving you a teasing look, and you let out an exasperated sigh.

“Asshole,” you say, and he grins.

“Only for you.”

You make a little contented noise as he unzips your fly and slips your jeans off.

“What happened to ‘Are you legal’?” you ask, grinning, as he slides your boxers off as well.

“Way to ruin the mood,” he says, rolling his eyes.

“Go easy on me, I’m just a child,” you say, sitting up and leaning over to kiss him.

“Great way to remind me you’re my kid brother’s best friend.”

“You love it really,” you murmur into his ear, trying your best to be sexy.

You giggle as he practically growls, kissing your neck and sliding one hand down your stomach. You feel a slight thrill as you realise you’re naked, in Dave’s apartment, making out with Dave’s hot brother. You try to feel a little guilty, but you’re too busy feeling pleased with yourself. This is way too much fun. You moan a little, hamming it up for Dave’s benefit, as his brother’s hand slips down even further. It’s safe to say you’re entering handjob territory. A handjob from Dave’s bro in Dave’s living room, then. New experiences every day.

“Fucking hell,” you hear Dave shout, as his bro’s hand starts sliding up and down and you start to moan a bit more, “You fucking assholes.”

“Takes one to know one,” you shout back, managing not to giggle.

Dave’s bro laughs, the sound deep and throaty, and starts kissing his way back down your torso. His hands slides away and goes to rest on your thigh, and you make a disappointed whining noise.

“Shut up,” he says, kissing his way even further down, infuriatingly slowly.

You slip your hand into his hair, trying to push his head down subtly, but he’s having none of it.

“I swear, I will leave right now if you don’t stop doing that.”

“Hmmph,” you say, pouting even though he can’t see you.

“You two are fucking awful,” Dave yells, and you think you can hear him beating his head against the wall.

“Well, you’re not fucking anyone!”

You giggle at your terrible comeback, and both Strider brothers groan.

“Please, no more jokes,” Dave’s bro says, and you laugh.

“Only if you give me a blowjob,” you say, only half-joking.

He doesn’t reply, but something tells you he agrees. That something may or may not be the fact that his mouth is now on your penis. You’re not really in the mood to form coherent thoughts any more. Or sentences. You hear a thumping bass from the next room as Dave puts on some loud music to drown you out. Normally, that would make you giggle, but right now you’re a little preoccupied.

“Ugh, you’re good,” you say, tugging gently at his hair.

“Shut up,” he says, his voice muffled but somehow still understandable.

You think you manage to last another thirty seconds, although you’re really not in the right frame of mind to be counting.

“Wow,” you say, as he pulls away, “Well... That... That was something.”

“Fancy returning the favour?” he asks, with a teasing grin.

You blush, thinking you’re not sure you can.

“Get dressed, asshole,” he says, standing up and throwing your clothes at you, “You should probably apologise to your friend.”

“What about you? He’s your brother.”

“Not my problem.”

You stick your middle finger up at him as he pulls on his t-shirt and walks out of the front door, slipping his stupid sunglasses back on. Striders, you decide, are assholes. You’re just glad you can be an asshole, too.


End file.
